Keeping the Stress out of Single Parenting

by Marta Dodd (researched through personal experience)

Budget Your Money.  Even if you are living pay cheque to pay cheque - like most of us, knowing how much money goes to where, can be a big help.  This gives you the relief that the bills are being paid, with a feel of how much you can spend on pocket money, school photos, birthday gifts, entertainment or maybe just for You!

Keep a Daily Schedule.  Time is important, so teach that to the kids, by implementing a routine.  Put together a schedule reflecting chore & homework time.  If the kids know their daily routine then it gives them something fun to work for when their room is clean or the rubbish has been taken out.  Don’t be afraid to make your own chores so that your children see you set a positive example.

Let Your Kids be Kids.  Even though taking on single parenting may have sometimes forced you to become serious and lacking laughter, remember those precious children never asked to be in this situation.  Don’t force them to grow up any faster and deal with the ‘Single Parent Issues’ that we have to deal with.  They are still kids and they shouldn’t have to worry about anything other than ‘Kid Issues’.

Stay Positive about the Other Parent.  No matter the circumstances, don’t down talk the other parent.  If the Other Parent isn’t paying child support, it’s none of the kid’s business and shouldn’t be something that is talked about if not brought up by the child.  Whether the parent is around or away, it shouldn’t matter.  We once saw good in that person and regardless of how it is now, your child may always think the world of their Other Parent.  In time the truth always comes out and the only way a child will know, is discovering for themselves.

Communicate to Your Children About the Special Circumstances of Your Family.  You can keep your kids informed without telling them everything.  If you talk to your kids early on, when they are ready, you can avoid having them learn from a distant relative, some other child from school or even a stranger.

Spend Quality Time with Your Children.  Keeping your family going takes a lot of energy and a good amount of Quality time away from the kids.  Set out a time each day to read, play a game, play on the computer or even learn something new.  It could be 2 hours or 20 minutes.  What matters is that your child knows it’s his/her time and they will look forward to each and every day.

Find Support and Use it.